PopImpressKA Journal: 5 Tips to Keep a Man in a Relationship by Luisa Diaz, Author of Sexy is Timeless
Having standards and boundaries is always important. You may ask, what exactly are standards and boundaries? Standards are your personal values—what’s important to you—and boundaries are the lines that you draw to protect those personal values. These boundaries protect you from unwelcome behavior. If you don’t know what your values are, I suggest that you invest time in finding out what is really important to you so you know how to handle different situations in your relationship with poise. For instance, what do you do when you agreed to a date at 8:00PM and the man shows up late at 8:30PM after he had called or texted you about his delay? Upon his arrival, after he explains how he got stuck in bad traffic, take his hand, look at him in his eyes, and tell him, “I understand, but I appreciate when people respect my time. Anyway, how are you?” Then engage in conversation by paying him a compliment, like saying, “I like that shirt you’re wearing, it looks good on you.” Don’t bring up his tardiness again, it won’t do any good to nag him about it. Let it go, and let yourself smile, laugh, and enjoy his company. Gently letting him know your boundary of punctuality shows him that you are a woman of character. Then he knows that in order to continue dating you, he will have to leave earlier next time. As a man, he wants your admiration and respect. There will be more things like that to discover in the relationship, so it is very important to set your boundaries when something doesn’t feel right to you or violates your personal code. Make sure that you communicate it in a clever and gracious way instead of a nagging or offensive way. Nonetheless, stay confident and assertive about your values.
Invest time in self-care. It’s always important to take care of yourself, and it makes a difference when you make an effort to put your best foot forward. You can get a mani/pedi and make your hair and makeup look nice and put together. In my opinion, mascara is a must to make for good eye contact, which is very sexy. I love my lipgloss for goodnight smooches. It shows you care when you dress your best whenever you see your man. Don’t get too comfortable, like wearing sweatpants and flip flops, too early in the relationship. Make sure you always smell good. When you know you look fabulous, you feel good about yourself, and that self-confidence is sexy.